Three years ago, I did a post on Cheeky starting school.
Now, as I kissed my second born good luck at the school gate, it felt different. Walking back, I was wondering how the same experience could elicit contrasting emotions.
It was hard with Cheeky, I admit. There was whole newness to it. The school, the kids in her class, the education system. How will she cope? Will they make it easy for her?
But this time round, there is a sense of melancholy coupled with excitement. There is sadness that a phase of childhood is lost forever, but there is also elation. School life has its share of adventure, after all.
When Cheeky started at school, the "babyness" continued with Aadi. First toddler and then preschool groups, park visits and soft play sojourns during the day, the small kid feeling was still prevalent. Not anymore.
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photo courtesy:silicon valley academy |
On the other hand, there is a delightful absence of apprehension. Aadi has been coming on school runs ever since Cheeky started three years ago. The benefit of acquaintance with the staff, playground and older kids has been handy, to say the least.
There is definite comfort in knowing that the path my boy is going to tread has been "tried and tested", thanks to his older sibling. It has resulted in such a smooth transition to school that my heart swelled with joy instead of tears, to see him march off into this nurturing environment.
On a personal front, maternal feelings aside, there is a quiet sense of liberation. As my baby embarks on his academic journey, time feels right to reclaim my individuality and space. There is a sense of loss, yet an undeniable feeling of the start of something new.
Coleridge's poem "Ring out the old, Ring in the new" comes to mind with some modification:
Ring out the old, ring in the new,
Look ahead, there's so much to do;
Letting go of the past how you
let in a morrow, full of adventures anew.
Letting go is so much about letting in too, isn't it?